Musings and Meandering Thoughts

What would you do if you weren't afraid?

I have a list.

A long one.

I recently knocked three items off it and I'm gearing up for the third.

My fears, by the way, did not come to fruition.


Was I embarrassed when my little brother (48 years young😂) loudly proclaimed that I write porn in front of his friends?


Did my sister-in-law low-key want to kill him?


Did I tell him I hated him?


But I'm not sure he understood what I was saying because I was laughing so hard.

See, my brothers are funny.

Pee-your-pants funny at times.

And very little is off limits.


I didn't want to reveal my pen name because I didn't want them to poke fun at me. The reason I didn't want them to poke fun? Because I felt (feel?) a little like hiding due to the, ahem, 'graphic nature' of certain scenes.

Most of me is proud, really freaking proud, of myself for writing 8 books. I love my beautiful stories. And I want to share them.

And I've learned that my brothers are proud of me. I can see it in their faces, feel it in their hugs.

And when one of my brother's friends, a woman I've never met before, piped up that she loves smut? I immediately offered to give her one of my books.

I could have kissed her. 

A smuthood sister.

She's one of my crew.

My books won't be everybody's cup of tea. And that's okay. I know that now. Some people prefer coffee. Others swear off caffeine altogether.

But if I continue to hide? I'll be hanging out with the vitamin water drinkers (no shade on vitamin water!) when I'm a double cream double sugar kind of girl.

If you slice off and shrink the parts of you that other people don't like, there will be nothing left of you in the end.

What's the point in that?

If you want to find your people, you need to live out loud.

If you want to belong, you need to accept yourself.

Own your truths.

Own your mistakes, your passions, your talents, and your foibles.

Brene Brown explains it best, but quite simply, belonging comes from within.

And in case you're wondering if I'm worried my brother will read my books?

I'm not.

I told him no outside research was required for the steamy scenes.😎

So, tell me.

What's holding you back from doing the things you want to do?

I'm betting we're all afraid of the same things.

Let's share.